Memories Forgotten

I had a strange experience this weekend.  

I was hosting a CAbi party at my house, for my aunt Kim who is a new consultant.  She brought her daughter, my cousin, Melissa with her.

Before the party, Melissa and I were reminiscing about times past.  Well, SHE was reminiscing.  I was listening and wondering to myself, why none of this even sounded slightly familiar.  It was me she was taking about after all.  "Remember the time you and Terra were putting on a show for me and Rochelle and you were pretending to be poor girls and you at cat food?"  WHAT?  I ate cat food?!

She talked about cats we had owned, in great detail.  I can barely remember that we had cats.  I do remember their names, but that's about it.  She could have been talking about a complete stranger for all I knew.  But it was my life she was speaking of.  Sitting there, listening to my past being told to me- was very odd.  Nothing she said even sounded familiar.  Are my memories really gone?  Was I even there?  Did I have a childhood?  :)

There have been times when someone from my teenage years will say, "Remember when...(fill in the blank)?" and I will instantly remember too.  But when it comes to my early childhood- say from birth to 12 years old, there's not much there.  I have bits and pieces of memories, but mostly ones that I have pictures from my scrapbooks to go along with.  And even then, I'm not sure that I actually remember what was going on in that picture.  It's just familiar.  What I have discovered, is that I remember more the feelings I had from that time of my life.  Was I happy, sad, loved, afraid, etc.  And some of the events that are tied to those feelings I sort of remember.

I can tell you anything you want to know about my high school years, but ask me about my childhood, and I'll most likely draw a blank. 

Frustrating.